Alice: Two Months

Dear Alice,

Today you are two months old. According to the doctor's office however, we have to wait until March 3 for it to be official. But 2 months ago, on a Tuesday morning, you were born.

In the last month you've already changed so much! You've gone from this skinny little newborn to this adorable little girl with chubby cheeks and elbows with dimples. You are digging the breastmilk and it shows!

I can't wait to find out more about your personality, but a couple of weeks ago you smiled at me and it was a full on grin! So now, I try to make you smile all the time. It's kind of hard, because I also want to get that gorgeous smile in a photo but you ARE NOT HAVING IT! You'll smile at me, at daddy, at your birds on your swing's mobile, but never at the camera. Maybe you're shy? Or you're like me and don't like your pictures no matter how good they are? (And really, how bad could they be at 2 months - you're adorable!). Anyway, I was so happy to see you smile up at me, this gummy grin that shows you know who I am and that you're glad to see me. It just makes my day. Sometimes, when I'm trying for the umpteenth time to put you down for a nap, and you are having none of it, because you want me to hold you, you'll look up at me from the bassinet and just grin, and I have to laugh because even though I know you're not trying to bribe me, it feels like it and I want to give in, because your smiles are like crack!

I can't seem to stop kissing you and neither can your daddy. I'm sure you wonder what the heck we're doing but we just can't seem to help it. I want you to know I love you and I hope that kissing you conveys that, cause wow, what a simple way to say it! I'd gladly do it a million times if that's what it takes. Because I adore you. You're finally starting to calm down and like daddy a little bit more - for awhile there it seemed like you only preferred me. But hey - I have the food, so it's only natural at this stage, because you're still tiny.

Sleeping has hit a rough patch. I posted a couple weeks ago that we'd put you down and you fell asleep by yourself and stayed asleep for like three hours. But then, I think you hit a growth spurt and sleeping went out the window. It almost seems like you're in pain (and we're totally talking to the doctor about that) sometimes and we worry. But it's gotten a little bit better. You don't want to nap unless you're sleeping on me, and because you are so exhausted I gave in for awhile. But now, I'm trying to wean you off of that. I am only slightly successful. At night, you have to be swaddled so you don't wake yourself up still, but you HATE it and scream until we let your arms out. But when you do sleep, it's adorable. You laugh in your sleep, and I can't wait to hear it when you're awake! And you sleep just like your daddy does, which is so cute and funny. Soon, you'll be sleeping (I hope) in your big-girl crib, not the bassinet next to me, and I know I'll miss having you close enough to touch. I've slept with you right next to me since you were born, and it's going to be weird to think you are independent enough to sleep farther away (but still in our room).

You've gone to the zoo and the art museum, and even for a walk in your stroller at the nature center, but so far I haven't managed to get you to the library where mommy works (see above: Not Sleeping). But I will. I'm already dreading going back to work, even part-time. I will miss you and worry about how you're doing with daddy and whether you fell asleep or are missing me. But right now I'm just savoring the time I have with you.